Put one foot in front of the other

Hello!
I'm finally feeling well enough to sit at my computer for a little while, thanks be to God!

My first week home is over.  Yesterday I finally got to eat "solid" food.  For breakfast I had runny Cream of Wheat, for lunch I had low fat cottage cheese, and for dinner I had loose mashed potatoes with chicken broth.  It was awesome, even though I was only able to eat about a teaspoon at a time.  I'm told that I'll be working up to about 2 tablespoons eventually.

On the pastor side, I have a wonderful retired pastor covering for me for a few weeks, however, I want to be kept in the loop with serious issues in the congregation.  During my first week after surgery, two congregation members suddenly took bad turns in their health to the point that there may be a funeral before I go back to work.  I told my secretary to refer all calls to my back up, but to email me about the situation.  Also, my back up calls me and keeps me up to date as well.

All of this was a little tough during my first week at home.  First, it was difficult for me to think about or concentrate.  Second, there was a feeling of guilt, because I wasn't there for them.  In the beginning of the week, when I was dealing with trial and error regarding food, I was filled with self doubt.  Had I been selfish taking this time away, getting this surgery, wondering if I really needed it or not.  Then two congregation members at once, and there's nothing that I can do.  Feeling as if I've let them down.

Today, I'm feeling better.  I walk around the house every 2 hours for exercise, and I'm taking lots of vitamins and eating properly.  I still worry about my congregation members, but now I know that I could be there (at a funeral), if not leading worship, should things progress quickly.  This brings me some comfort.

I'm trying to take one day at a time, putting one foot in front of the other.  This made me think of the song from the Christmas cartoon movie, Santa Claus is Coming to Town.  It was a favorite of mine when I was a kid.  Young Kris Kringle is sharing his plan with the Winter Warlock, trying to turn him from mean to nice.  Kris sings, "Put One Foot in Front of the Other" telling Winter that it may be a difficult journey, but he can do it, one step at a time.  My journey image of Pinocchio also experienced such difficulties, pushing the boundaries, getting distracted from the tasks at hand, and falling in with the wrong crowd.  It took many steps for him to get to the end of his journey toward being a really boy.

I've been blessed to receive many cards from congregation members wishing me good health and a speedy recovery.  In one card was written, "Good Luck - Think Slim."  It made me smile, yet I know that luck has nothing to do with this journey and getting "slim" isn't the primary purpose either.  The primary purpose to be as healthy as I can be and to live a longer life.

I find comfort today in the 23rd Psalm (ELW)

The Lord is my shepherd

I shall not be in want.

The Lord makes me lie down

in green pastures

and leads me beside still waters.

You restore my soul, O Lord,

and guide me along right pathways

for your name's sake.

Though I walk through the valley

of the shadow of death,

I shall fear no evil

for you are with me,

your rod and your staff,

they comfort me.

You prepare a table before me

in the presence of my enemies

You anoint my head with oil

and my cup is running over.

Surely goodness and mercy

shall follow me

all the days of my life

and I will dwell

in the house of the Lord forever.

 

I can imagine the still waters and green pastures, and I know that the Lord brings my congregation members comfort and care, just as I am comforted.  I trust in the Lord to guide me and know that I'm not alone during dark times, trials, and distractions.  My shepherd is guiding me one step at a time.

 

Thanks for following my journey and keeping me in your thoughts and prayers.

Pastor Deb